In efforts to make the masses slightly more literate, I'm going to start posting a bit of actual literature to feast your eyes on instead of short bloggy snippets with bad grammar and too many commas about some stupid celebrity shit.
Of course I'M not going to do the writing, geez, I'm just the smart alack (sp) blog writer with a short attention span, devoid of empathy for people who work hard.
So with that, meet Aaron Hartzler. He's tall, confident, smart, handsome and way more successful, so read what he's written. Oh, he's funny too! I loves it. An actor-turned-auteur, he writes about his F'd up family, life in hollywood, gay shit, and overall madness running through his head.
Here's a snippet of brilliance from his essay about his brothers making it into the entertainment mags before him....
It's the fact that my brother Josh couldn't care less about being in a magazine that makes me crazy. I have been dedicated to a craft since I was four years old. I have a mountain of student loan debt backing up not one, but two degrees in acting. I have a Master's degree in Make Believe. But my brother Josh is in STAR magazine? He's got a Master's degree in counseling for the love of God. From a Bible college.
At least Caleb is gorgeous. He eats nothing but egg whites and runs four miles a day. Fine. Put the boy in Details. My Dad is 6'2", and of the five kids in our family, of which I am the oldest, everyone but Josh is tall and statuesque. Josh even makes jokes about how he's the milkman's son. He got mom's genes, and while the women in her family are tiny beauties, the men are all just over five feet tall, and, well, husky. But there he is. Page 22. Josh in full-color, standing there looking disgruntled that he can't hail a cab. He's got a weird little beard and a receding hairline, and he's short, and squat. He's wearing a giant, puffy coat that makes it appear that his sternum has swallowed his neck, and he's scowling. Picking Josh over me for a picture in STAR magazine is like designing the cover of a travel brochure for Middle Earth, and choosing Gimli over Legolas.
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Read the whole thing
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